Session Three

Tying in the Draft Statement to the Youth Study

 

Lines 909-911: “Sometimes friendships become sexual in the narrower sense of giving rise to overtly erotic impulses and stimulation. Erotic interest between adults open to romantic relationship can be a desired part of the growth of trust and intimacy."

Lines 968-974: “For this reason, this church teaches that degrees of physical intimacy should be carefully matched to degrees of affection and commitment. This also suggests a way to understand why this church has taught that the greatest physical intimacies, such as intercourse, should be matched with and sheltered by the highest level of binding commitment, such as found in marriage. It is in marriage that promises of fidelity and public accountability provide the foundational basis and support for trust, intimacy, and safety, especially for the most vulnerable."

Lines 976-994: " This is also why this church does not support non-monogamous, promiscuous, and transient sexual relationships or casual sexual encounters. Indulging immediate desires for satisfaction, sexual or otherwise, is to “gratify the desires of the flesh” (Galatians 5:16).

Such relationships undermine the dignity and integrity of individuals. In such situations, physical intimacy does not accompany the growth of mutual self-knowledge. Absent the presence of physical, emotional, intellectual, and spiritual trust and commitment, such relationships can damage the self and an individual’s future capacity to live out committed and trustworthy relationships. Such fleeting relationships misuse the gift of sexual intimacy and are much more likely to be unjust, abusive, and exploitative.

While this church does not encourage such relationships, it insists that every sexual relationship entails responsibility. All sexually active people have the responsibility to protect the other person from emotional as well as physical harm. All sexually active people have a particular responsibility to protect themselves and their partners from sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and HIV."

Lines 997-1003: "Trust is a quality of relationship that, while never perfected, is nurtured and reinforced over time. The trust and mutual reliance shared by two adults who are deeply committed to each other is one of the most beautiful, abiding, and transformative forms of human relationship. The depth of care, matched to an intimacy of touch, creates relationships much stronger than simple and momentary erotic interest. Sexual intimacy matched with promises of fidelity and public accountability nurtures bonds that allow persons to flourish and provides a rich context through which new life may enter the world."

Lines 1072-1083: “This church does not favor or give approval to cohabitation arrangements outside of marriage. It has a special concern when such arrangements are entered into as an end in themselves. It does, however, acknowledge the social forces at work that encourage such practices. This church also recognizes the pastoral and familial issues that accompany these contemporary social patterns. In cases where a decision is made for cohabitation, this church expects its pastors and members to help the couple recognize a special obligation to be clear and candid with each other about their plans, expectations, and levels of mutual commitment.

In entering cohabitation arrangements the couple also should consider that, as opposed to seeking marriage, choosing cohabitation can indicate resistance, consciously or unconsciously, to deeper or more permanent levels of commitment."